A child asked his father, “How were people born?” The father replied, “Adam and Eve made babies. Then their babies grew up and made babies, and so on.” Later, the child went to his mother and asked her the same question. She answered, “We were monkeys, and over time we evolved to become the people we are today.” The child ran back to his father and said angrily, “You lied to me!” The father calmly replied, “No, son....

The hitting coach for the Cubs entered the manager’s office. “Skipper,” he said, “I’ve got some good news and some bad news.” “What’s the good news?” the manager asked. “You know that new pitching machine we bought to help the guys with batting practice? We got it installed, and the players started using it today.” “Okay,” said the manager, “what’s the bad news?” “It just beat us 5–1.”

Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each buy a ticket. They notice the three engineers buying only one ticket. Accountant: “How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?” Engineer: “Watch and you’ll see.” On the train, the accountants take their seats. The engineers cram into a restroom and close the door. When the conductor co...