Little Johnny was constantly late for school, and what was worse, he always had a huge lie to explain why. The teacher finally told the principal, “I’ve had it with his exaggerations.” The principal replied, “Send Johnny to me the next time he’s late. I’ll tell him a lie so big he’ll never tell another one.” The very next day, Johnny showed up two hours late. Johnny said, “I was two hours early today, so I stopped to...

Little Johnny was fast asleep in class while the lesson was going on. The teacher noticed and asked angrily, “Why are you sleeping while I’m teaching? You’re not listening!” Little Johnny replied, “Madam, your voice was so sweet, that’s why I fell asleep.” The teacher snapped back, “Then why aren’t the others sleeping?” “Because they are not listening,” Johnny answered. The teacher frowned and said, “Alright then. If...

A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?" A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said, "All I want out of life is four little animals, just like my Mom always says". The teacher asked, "Really and what four little animals would that be?" The little girl said, "A mink on my back, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bed and a jackass to pay for all of it." The teacher got a coughing fit a...