I went to a mixed religion convention. The Christian Priest came, laid his hands on my hand and said, “By the will of Jesus Christ, you will walk today!” I smiled and told him I was not paralysed. The Rabbi came, laid his hands on my hand and said, “By the will of God Almighty, you will walk today! I was less amused when I told him there was nothing wrong with me. The Mullah came, took my hands and said, “Insha Allah...
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says, "Calm down, sir, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "Okay, now what?"
A man enters the emergency room with two black eyes, multiple lacerations, and a seven iron wrapped around his neck. The doctor pulls him into one of the examining rooms and says, "What the hell happened to you, my friend?" "Well, doc," the man replies, "It's like this. My wife and I were out on the golf course off the eighth tee when we both wind up slicing into a cow pasture next to the course. So we both head into...