A woman wanted to serve her guests mushroom-smothered steak, but she had no mushrooms and no time to buy any.

Her husband suggested, “Why don’t you go pick some of the mushrooms growing wild down by the stream?”

“No,” she replied, “some wild mushrooms are poisonous.”

“Well, I see squirrels eating them and they’re fine,” he said.

So she picked a bunch, washed them, sliced them, and sautéed them for dinner.

Then she went out on the back porch and gave Spot, their dog, a double handful.

Spot ate every bite.

All morning long, she watched the dog. After a few hours with no effect, she decided the mushrooms were safe.

The dinner was a huge success.

After everyone finished eating, her daughter came in and whispered, “Mum… Spot is dead.”

Trying to stay calm, the woman rushed out of the room and called the doctor, explaining everything.

The doctor said, “That’s serious, but we can handle it. I’ll send an ambulance. We’ll pump their stomachs, give enemas, and everyone should be fine. Just keep them calm.”

Soon they heard sirens as the ambulance arrived.

The doctor and paramedics went to work.

One by one, each guest was taken into the bathroom, given an enema, and had their stomach pumped.

After midnight, when the last person was done, the doctor said, “Everyone will be fine now,” and left.

The exhausted hosts and guests sat weakly in the living room.

Then the daughter came in again and said, “I can’t believe that guy!”

“What guy?” her mother asked.

“The bastard who ran over Spot… he didn’t even slow down.”