A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself.

“You don’t have to let your wife bully you,” the doctor said. “Go home and show her who’s the boss.”

The husband decided to take the advice.

He went home, slammed the door, looked at his wife and growled,

“From now on, you’re taking orders from me. I want my supper right now. After you set the table, go upstairs and lay out my clothes.”

“Tonight I’m going out with the boys. You’re staying home where you belong.”

Then he added, “And another thing—do you know who’s going to tie my bow tie?”

His wife looked at him calmly and replied,

“I certainly do… an undertaker.”